Saying Goodbye to the fake smile & social media image

Some of you have noticed the change happening in my life & on my social media pages.
Others don’t follow close enough to notice….. but you should! 🙂 Keep reading for raw, sincere truth & the process of change.

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After 18 months, Im finally comfortable enough to start sharing my new life & I think you deserve the authentic ‘Lisa.’

I find it VERY important that I help you to understand this isn’t just a ‘feel good – motivate you’ health & wellness page.
At least not any more.  

This has morphed into a ‘get out of your own head & let’s get real’ health & wellness page.

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You see…… for years I lived in a marriage where we weren’t truly happy but made it look amazing to others. That’s not living a life of authenticity.

We were the perfect family with 1 son & 1 daughter, made good money, lived in a beautiful house, drove new vehicles, never had a bad reputation, kept discrepancies hidden, and had pretty yet fake smiles.

I wasa physical therapist & he an engineer & our children were attractive with good grades & natural athletes. (The kids still are exactly that but now getting pre-teen attitudes. Gonna be a rough next few years). 😫🙄

The truth was that was just the image we were portraying.

Why did I feel the stress to portray such a perfect image?

I have yet to figure that out… But i assume the pressure of society had a good deal to do with it. Yet… it was far from the truth.

Behind closed doors we were living a life of loneliness yet trying to raise our minis in a happy home. Kids are smart & have great intuition – they knew we weren’t happy regardless of the fake smiles.

Someone in the family once told me that our relationship was ‘doable’ so I should stay. I suppose it was……. but it wasn’t authentic & not how I was raised. I was raised in a home where you speak your mind, stand up for each other, learn to forgive, & love hard. My parents were always holding hands, dancing in the kitchen, & although they had arguments, I saw them love each other thru them vs ignore them. They taught us how to apologize & agree to disagree.

I found myself unable to forgive my husband for words & actions. I couldn’t move forward, I felt ignored and as if no one had my back, and therefore my relationships with my parents/siblings started to struggle too.
I became internally an angry, burnt out mom hiding behind a false image & pretty smile.

That’s when I began running.
It was my peaceful oasis – I ran to escape my feelings, reality, being a parent & then I found myself praying & crying during my marathon training runs.
Professional marriage counseling was a blessing & I learned a lot but making my body push hard & run long distance was my saving grace. It gave me a workout high & relieved stress not to mention strengthened my relationship with God on a few levels.

Yet….. home life continued to not be what I thought it should be. I wanted to hold someone’s hand & wake up to morning hugs. I wanted to be told I’m loved & felt appreciated. I wanted him to fear losing ME. I didn’t want ‘doable’…. I wanted more. I think he did too.

Then, dynamics changed (I’m not going to be an angry person & dish details) but I couldn’t handle it & filed for divorce. I kept it a big secret because I was embarrassed & felt like I had failed. Honestly…. I’m not used to failing at anything so it was very tough for me to admit I was going through a divorce. Much of my small home town & family didn’t realize what I was going through. I kept it very low key.

The divorce itself was easy. No lawyers. We met with a private mediator to have the paperwork drawn up. Emotionally I was a mess, but I’m good at compartmentalizing so only my inner circle of friends new my struggles. My parents didn’t even know when the divorce was finalized.

We lived together 2 months after the divorce to help eachother get our feet on the ground…..I wasn’t angry anymore & I knew I was going to feel freedom soon so it wasn’t that bad.

Since the divorce – my relationship with my Mom had gotten much better, my kids have been more open with their feelings & showing love with hugs & cuddles, I’ve found out how strong I am & that I can do all the lawn work & fix the garbage disposal on my own!!

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I struggle some days & fail often with words & actions. I cry more than I ever have but think of those tears as soul cleansers vs weakness. I’m not afraid to show the tears anymore.

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I’ve grown a lot & I now know that the actions & words I needed weren’t only dreams & wishes. People actually kiss, hug, talk about deep topics, & wake up happy!!

Long story….. but it leads me to this.

  • I’m authentic now.
  • No fake smiles but real ones.
  • I’m not afraid to cry or feel pain.
  • I got the tattoo I always wanted & live by my rules.
  • I curse. Im sassy. I love hard & care deeply —– and that’s ok!!
  • I have a dirty mind & don’t apologize for it.
  • I eat nachos & wings. I like beer & tequila.
  • I yell at my kids sometimes. (Bedtime when they won’t go to bed until they push my buttons every damn night).
  • I like my quiet days when the kids are with their dad.
  • I still workout nearly daily & eat well 80% of the time.
  • I have 10-12 more pounds I want to lose.
  • I’m not perfect & it’s ok.
  • I wake up with huge wild bed head & sometimes look like hell.
  • I make no apologies for being REAL these days & this page will reflect my real life & self in hopes of helping you to not feel pressured to live that ‘social media perfect life’ either!!

If you don’t like it….. I’m ok with that.
I’m a single mom doing it my way & working as a therapist, sports nutritionist, small business owner, & coaching others to be entrepreneurs with me so we can all succeed. I’m a successful Team Beachbody coach & did I mention I’m not afraid of hard work??

You’ll see my unfiltered thoughts & words….. I’ll probably offend some people & my mom will shake her head wondering what kind of woman she raised at times. Lol!!

But…. my social media biz pages are my life as a single parent succeeding through failing forward & teaching others the info & techniques I know to lose weight & be better athletes. I connect well with people of all ages & possess a lot of internal positive energy.

Above all……. my SMILE is genuine now.  Hence my new team & business motto:

Sweat, SMILE, Eat & Repeat. 💕

img_1757I hope you’ll appreciate the unfiltered authenticity & genuine person I am these days!!! If not….. so be it. I’ll still be A-Ok!

Reflect & question yourself….. are you being authentic with yourself? Your family? Your life?  Why not?

Leave a comment with your authentic feelings regarding what’s holding you back from showing your genuine self to the world!!

Who is YourFitness-411? (A woman worth meeting!)

I think it’s time you learn a little more about my personal journey so that you can understand how I got to where I am today.
Lisa's phone July 2014.  Adult family night and beforeafter pics 184 

I was a very active high school athlete.  Back then, there were no ‘travel teams’ and coaches actually wanted you to participate in different sports to stay active (I still believe this is a good thing and am disappointed when children are told to focus on 1 sport at too young of an age).  Don’t get me wrong…I understand in today’s world the importance of honing in on a sport and becoming good at it in order to make HS teams.  I came from a small Ohio town where there were only about 10-15 girls trying out for the teams….so the chance of making it was fairly high.  
I played volleyball, basketball, and softball.  I was the starting setter for my Volleyball team (very successful team: State Champions 1992 and returned to state but lost 2004), starting varsity pitcher for the softball team all 4 years of HS, and a forward in basketball.  I am still very active in Volleyball and have been playing for almost 26 years!  I now play on co-ed indoor leagues even though it takes me longer to get off the floor after a dive.  😛
HS volleyballAfter high school, attended the University of Cincinnati and graduated as a Physical Therapist Assistant.  I worked in Cincinnati, Ohio with TriHealth Pavilion who treated some of the Cincinnati Reds players.
It was the best job ever!  (I was too young to realize that at the time).  

I continued to stay very active and enjoyed my workouts.  I’ve always had a ‘gymnast’ build and have learned to love it.  I had a very good core region and once again…. Didn’t appreciate it in my 20’s! 

At the age of 29, I became a Mom.  My baby boy surprised me and decided to enter the world at 32 weeks (2 months early) and he lived in the NICU for 5 weeks.  During those 5 weeks, I emotionally and physically went to hell.  I sat by his ‘glass box’ staring at him for 5 weeks, watching the monitors and praying I would get to plan many birthday parties for him. He gave us many scares during those 5 weeks and the following couple of years were rough with him being ill often.
nicu jake and me
I rarely went home unless it was to sleep during the time he was in the NICU. I partially dislocated my hip during those 5 weeks and was on crutches. I was having an awful time.  I drove past a Zestos ice cream shop going to and from the hospital and fell in love with their black raspberry smoothie.  That ended up being a big mistake.  I justified it because it seemed ‘healthier’ than other options at the time and I wasn’t eating normal food patterns.  I came home after being in the hospital all day and ate whatever I could…. I was a train wreck, but kept telling myself I was ‘fine’ and could handle it, when I should have leaned on others for support. 
Jacob came home from the hospital and within 1 week I was very ill with vertigo.  That is when I Iost the hearing in my left ear for reasons the doctors cannot explain.  I went through numerous tests to rule out brain tumors and such, and more doctor appointment trying to fix the problem.  Seven cortisone shots in my ear drum later and no significant changes. 
To this day, my hearing continues to decrease and I wear a hearing aid in my left ear. 

Over the next couple of years I tried to lose weight but never got back to my 125-130lbs. in which I loved my body.  I then suffered 2 miscarriages and the last one was diagnosed as a ‘partial molar pregnancy’ (http://www.webmd.com/baby/tc/molar-pregnancy-topic-overview) and I miscarried at 12 weeks.  Once again…. Emotional overload.  Losing a child is the most pain I can ever imagine.  What do we do in times of emotional stress?  We turn to food.  So, there I was…. With more pregnancy weight on top of the 8-10 lbs. I didn’t lose from the first pregnancy.  To top it off, my 2.5 year old son had a minor heart surgery to repair a structure.  AAhhh!!!  Six months after my second miscarriage, I was cleared to get pregnant again and so I did.  Lydia was born at 38 weeks and a healthy baby girl!! 
Pretty Lydia
A few months after her birth, my sister in law told me she was going to run a 5K.  I had thought about doing that also, but 3.1 miles seemed like a forever distance.  I’m competitive and decided I could run it too, so I trained for about 10 weeks and ran my first race.  I crossed the finish line at 34 minutes and my sister in law beat me…… did I mention she was pregnant?  Yep, a pregnant woman beat me!!!  That fueled my fire and here I am 6+ years later having ran 5 half marathons, 2 full marathons, and bunch of 5K & 10K races.  I also was on a team of 12 for a Ragnar race which ran from Miami, FL to Key West in February.  I LOVED it and am running an ULTRA Ragnar race (team of 6) this fall in Vegas.

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Let me backtrack….. After that first 5K I decided to get fit.  I was getting very short of breath with the running, so I went to the doctor.   I was diagnosed with Asthma and EIB (Exercise Induced Bronchospams).  I got treatment and my running became easier.

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I saw a ‘Slim in 6’ infomercial while unloading the dishwasher one day and I decided to call and order it.  I got bored with that after 4 weeks  and needed more.  My friend was a Team Beachbody coach and so I purchased P90X from her website.  A few weeks later, I bought Shakeology in an effort to speed up my results and for nutrition reasons.  I completed the program and my speed increased and I was down 12lbs.  After 2 months of debating & praying, I became a Team Beachbody coach in October 2010.  I purchased the Insanity program with my discount and completed it, which helped me to build a strong lower body base and drop another few pounds.  Not knowing what to do after that…. I repeated the Insanity program again. 

People took notice of my results and started purchasing the programs from me and that fueled my fire to be more than just a Team Beachbody coach but to actually train people.  I started my own little company called “YourFitness-411.” I wanted a company that would allow me to focus on providing others with fitness information (411) that could help them without feeling as though I was only interested in ‘selling’ them a product.  True coaching is so much more than helping them with the products!!  Accountability and support are key to success and I knew I needed to offer that. Even with all my current clients, I still pride myself on the fact that I offer personalized assistance for people who come to me wanting help. 
By the way…. I now own 15 of the Team Beachbody home programs!  #AddictedtoHomeExercise
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With my therapy knowledge, I was doing well, but we all know that food is the #1 problem, so I decided to get a nutrition education too.  After MANY research papers and chapters studying, I passed my test and became an ISSA Specialist in Sports Nutrition in early 2013.  I have now mentored many challenge groups and personally assist many towards weight loss and muscle building.  I was also quoted in the “Max Sports &Fitness” – May 2014 issue regarding supplements for the athlete!  I’ve helped people lose hundreds of pounds over the past 4 years and am very proud of my growing team of Team Beachbody coaches and their success not only regarding their own body, but also creating income. 

Over these years, I have also written an essay on my life with EIB which I submitted to a competition and it made it to the top 10 in the country!!  I almost won a dinner with my favorite athlete, Apollo Ohno, but I fell short on votes.  Sigh….
I am proud to say that my work as a fitness coach has introduced me to people all over the world & I’ve built some amazing friendships.  I am the coach for Shinedown’s drummer, Barry Kerch, and got to meet him backstage at a concert and hug the entire band!  I still check in with him from time to time and am very proud of the band’s accomplishments.  They used the Insanity program and it literally saved the lead singer’s life. 
barry's tweetsbarry kerch and me~
I still have about 10 lbs. I want to lose and I will.  However, more importantly, I am a Mom who is leading by example for her kids.  My kiddos know what a protein/carb/fat is and they are learning when to eat what to help them feel better during the day.  I’m giving them information that they will use forever!!  And….memories!  They were able to watch me cross the line of my second marathon in Columbus, Ohio and I was overjoyed at seeing them post-race.  They spent 5 hours chasing me around that course and were amazing troopers! 

I’m thankful that I have the opportunity to affect lives in a positive manner and create opportunities for others.  Thank you for believing in me and trusting me with your success!!  Now…. Go make your own story!  I can’t wait to hear it!  (I only hope you’ll allow me to be a part of your journey!)  
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Please feel free to contact me at Bashford.Lisa@yahoo.com if you would like to discuss your fitness options or would like the supportive community of me and my team.  
You can also find me on all social media outlets listed on my webiste:  YourFitness-411.com

Family Meal Planner still in the works! Stay tuned…

The more thought I put into creating the family meal planner documents that I have been working on,
the more information I want to pass along!  

This project began as a simple way that I can assist families with basic, healthy, meal options.  I have been asked many times over the past 4 years, “What do you feed your family?” and so I felt it was time to create organized information complete with grocery list, recipes, and healthy options for each meals. I do not believe in “you must eat this for lunch” meal plans.  It’s just not practical for family lifestyle, or anyone, honestly.  Friends want to go out for dinner, the chicken gets freezer burn, the veggies grow mold…..things happen & if you only have one option, then you feel stuck.  Unfortunately, much of the dietary advice available today focuses on what you “cannot” or “should not” eat and little information is out there regarding meal plans and the amazing food you SHOULD be eating!  
Food is beautiful & delicious…..even healthy food!
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I am an advocate for fighting childhood obesity.  This kind of fell into my lap to be honest.  A few years ago, I felt I was being called to serve women/families who have had premature infants (my son was born at 32 weeks, weighing less than 4lbs) and I was considering joining forces with the March of Dimes.  I  still support the March of Dimes, but feel I can do more personal assistance with helping parents feed their tiny people.  I am a fitness-focused Mom and became a sport nutritionist so I could not only help my own ageing runner’s body, but feed my family correctly and be a better source for my customers.

Once I became a Mom… I realized how stressful meal times can be!!  Yikes!!  Now I understand the effort that went into the meals my parents made while being working parents!  They did very well based on their job hours, having 3 children involved in sports, and juggling life in general.  I remember sitting at the table as a family, praying, and eating dinner together. The meals were always hearty & relatively healthy…but back then nutrition didn’t get the attention it gets now.  And no….. the food then and the food now are NOT created equal.  Just because you ate it as a child, doesn’t mean your children should too!!!  

This project has really got me thinking.  What started off as a simple list of food options to create a healthy diet….. has evolved into much more. I’m overwhelmed sometimes!  I don’t only want to create meal options, but I want to educate parents/people on WHY they should eat certain foods and WHY it’s important to make healthy options vs. boxed mac & cheese.  (Cheese from a powder form shouldn’t be a dinner staple!)  

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Just to clue you in a little on what I am working on…… here are some topics that will be covered.  

  • How to Plan Balanced Meals.
  • Components of meals – what should be included.
  • Why are family meals are important?
  • Childhood Obesity – a growing epidemic.
  • Why children should be involved in meal prep?
  • Restaurant guides & social aspect of eating out. 
  • What food items should be staples in my house?
  • Organized Grocery List
  • Easy recipes including slow cooker recipes (best invention Ever!) 
  • Saving money on your grocery bill.  

People who purchase my documents/packages (whatever I’m going to call it) will also have my personal assistance as needed to answer any questions.  
I’m excited to see this come to fruition, but I have a lot more to do so be patient!  🙂  
Stay tuned………

Follow me on social media!!  I’d love to answer your questions on facebook at YourFitnessInfo !dinners ready

Lisa is a Physical Therapist Assistant x17 years, a Specialist in Sports Nutrition, and owner of YourFitness-411.com