Saying Goodbye to the fake smile & social media image
Some of you have noticed the change happening in my life & on my social media pages.
Others don’t follow close enough to notice….. but you should! 🙂 Keep reading for raw, sincere truth & the process of change.
After 18 months, Im finally comfortable enough to start sharing my new life & I think you deserve the authentic ‘Lisa.’
I find it VERY important that I help you to understand this isn’t just a ‘feel good – motivate you’ health & wellness page.
At least not any more.
This has morphed into a ‘get out of your own head & let’s get real’ health & wellness page.
You see…… for years I lived in a marriage where we weren’t truly happy but made it look amazing to others. That’s not living a life of authenticity.
We were the perfect family with 1 son & 1 daughter, made good money, lived in a beautiful house, drove new vehicles, never had a bad reputation, kept discrepancies hidden, and had pretty yet fake smiles.
I wasa physical therapist & he an engineer & our children were attractive with good grades & natural athletes. (The kids still are exactly that but now getting pre-teen attitudes. Gonna be a rough next few years). 😫🙄
The truth was that was just the image we were portraying.
Why did I feel the stress to portray such a perfect image?
I have yet to figure that out… But i assume the pressure of society had a good deal to do with it. Yet… it was far from the truth.
Behind closed doors we were living a life of loneliness yet trying to raise our minis in a happy home. Kids are smart & have great intuition – they knew we weren’t happy regardless of the fake smiles.
Someone in the family once told me that our relationship was ‘doable’ so I should stay. I suppose it was……. but it wasn’t authentic & not how I was raised. I was raised in a home where you speak your mind, stand up for each other, learn to forgive, & love hard. My parents were always holding hands, dancing in the kitchen, & although they had arguments, I saw them love each other thru them vs ignore them. They taught us how to apologize & agree to disagree.
I found myself unable to forgive my husband for words & actions. I couldn’t move forward, I felt ignored and as if no one had my back, and therefore my relationships with my parents/siblings started to struggle too.
I became internally an angry, burnt out mom hiding behind a false image & pretty smile.
That’s when I began running.
It was my peaceful oasis – I ran to escape my feelings, reality, being a parent & then I found myself praying & crying during my marathon training runs.
Professional marriage counseling was a blessing & I learned a lot but making my body push hard & run long distance was my saving grace. It gave me a workout high & relieved stress not to mention strengthened my relationship with God on a few levels.
Yet….. home life continued to not be what I thought it should be. I wanted to hold someone’s hand & wake up to morning hugs. I wanted to be told I’m loved & felt appreciated. I wanted him to fear losing ME. I didn’t want ‘doable’…. I wanted more. I think he did too.
Then, dynamics changed (I’m not going to be an angry person & dish details) but I couldn’t handle it & filed for divorce. I kept it a big secret because I was embarrassed & felt like I had failed. Honestly…. I’m not used to failing at anything so it was very tough for me to admit I was going through a divorce. Much of my small home town & family didn’t realize what I was going through. I kept it very low key.
The divorce itself was easy. No lawyers. We met with a private mediator to have the paperwork drawn up. Emotionally I was a mess, but I’m good at compartmentalizing so only my inner circle of friends new my struggles. My parents didn’t even know when the divorce was finalized.
We lived together 2 months after the divorce to help eachother get our feet on the ground…..I wasn’t angry anymore & I knew I was going to feel freedom soon so it wasn’t that bad.
Since the divorce – my relationship with my Mom had gotten much better, my kids have been more open with their feelings & showing love with hugs & cuddles, I’ve found out how strong I am & that I can do all the lawn work & fix the garbage disposal on my own!!
I struggle some days & fail often with words & actions. I cry more than I ever have but think of those tears as soul cleansers vs weakness. I’m not afraid to show the tears anymore.
I’ve grown a lot & I now know that the actions & words I needed weren’t only dreams & wishes. People actually kiss, hug, talk about deep topics, & wake up happy!!
Long story….. but it leads me to this.
- I’m authentic now.
- No fake smiles but real ones.
- I’m not afraid to cry or feel pain.
- I got the tattoo I always wanted & live by my rules.
- I curse. Im sassy. I love hard & care deeply —– and that’s ok!!
- I have a dirty mind & don’t apologize for it.
- I eat nachos & wings. I like beer & tequila.
- I yell at my kids sometimes. (Bedtime when they won’t go to bed until they push my buttons every damn night).
- I like my quiet days when the kids are with their dad.
- I still workout nearly daily & eat well 80% of the time.
- I have 10-12 more pounds I want to lose.
- I’m not perfect & it’s ok.
- I wake up with huge wild bed head & sometimes look like hell.
- I make no apologies for being REAL these days & this page will reflect my real life & self in hopes of helping you to not feel pressured to live that ‘social media perfect life’ either!!
If you don’t like it….. I’m ok with that.
I’m a single mom doing it my way & working as a therapist, sports nutritionist, small business owner, & coaching others to be entrepreneurs with me so we can all succeed. I’m a successful Team Beachbody coach & did I mention I’m not afraid of hard work??
You’ll see my unfiltered thoughts & words….. I’ll probably offend some people & my mom will shake her head wondering what kind of woman she raised at times. Lol!!
But…. my social media biz pages are my life as a single parent succeeding through failing forward & teaching others the info & techniques I know to lose weight & be better athletes. I connect well with people of all ages & possess a lot of internal positive energy.
Above all……. my SMILE is genuine now. Hence my new team & business motto:
Sweat, SMILE, Eat & Repeat. 💕
I hope you’ll appreciate the unfiltered authenticity & genuine person I am these days!!! If not….. so be it. I’ll still be A-Ok!
Reflect & question yourself….. are you being authentic with yourself? Your family? Your life? Why not?
Leave a comment with your authentic feelings regarding what’s holding you back from showing your genuine self to the world!!
That ugly word we don’t like to talk about but we all have. ADDICTION.
I realize that I’ve experienced situations this year in which I thought I always understood but never TRULY had an ‘Ah-Ha’ moment until recently. 2016 has been a year that has tested my patience, limits, mindset, and integrity.
Addiction is characterized by compulsive engagement in rewarding stimuli despite adverse consequences. This can be behavior, substance, withdrawal, etc.
It is a disorder of the brain’s reward system.
Addiction regardless if it’s smoking, social media, gambling, our cell phones, alcohol, sex, food, behaviors, mindsets, or even over exercising can lead to complete breakdown of social support, true love, and ourselves. And, addiction, regardless of what it is, takes away dreams/goals and often times makes our futures blurry. What we believe we want is often taken away not by the addiction, but by the choices that addiction causes.
Recently, after a breakup, I have been reflecting on relationships and what makes people behave they way they do….including my own actions.
Some people say they want a steady relationship, trustworthy mate, solid job, nice home, family atmosphere, and people to love us/them. I believe them when they say those ‘wants’…… but actions speak an entirely different story.
Those very same people are the ones who destroy their own dreams, goals & everything good in their life by giving into their weakness. The addiction over rules the good choices and therefore, we become dark versions of ourselves that we do not recognize. Then, we feel embarrassed, shameful, and irritated with ourselves that we worked so diligently towards that goal only to succumb to the weakness and voice that screams….. “It won’t hurt anything, just do it.” We leave those close to us, move on…. and repeat the patterns with new people only to feel the need to move along again.
We never really are able to put roots down and establish a life.
Isn’t it amazing how W-E-A-K we as humans can be to that addiction or bad habit?
Think about it for a minute……..
- Have you ever worked hard to lose weight then binged on kit-kats dipped in the PB jar?? (Ok…maybe that’s just my dirty addiction!)
But seriously — I work directly with people whom are addicted to food everyday and they don’t realize they have a problem. Or maybe they do, but they allow food to create joint pain, depression, diabetes, heart disease, strokes, high blood pressure, weight gain, and more. We know that eating Cheetos isn’t right, yet we eat the whole bag without thinking. - How about the smoker who quits only to start again because they need something in their hands?
- The person who uses alcohol to forget about the stressors of life? Or uses alcohol to relax and feel more comfortable in social gatherings?
- The sex addict who can’t remain loyal and feels they have a right to sleep with anyone regardless of the situation simply because they are curious or feel the need for sex.
- The extreme exerciser who pushes through significant pain for a goal…… then ends up with surgery and in physical therapy because they didn’t listen to the body giving them signals to slow down?
- How about the person who doesn’t trust others because of past experiences and through that distrusting behavior creates unnecessary issues within the relationship? Poor mindsets that continue repeatedly and breakdown relationships can also be considered an addiction.
It’s absurd that we can talk ourselves into that addiction and find a way to justify it at the time, only to have absolutely no concrete idea as to why we gave in in the first place.
We will risk losing EVERYTHING for that drink, bite, taste, feeling, possible wealth……and even after losing it all and vowing to never allow it to happen again……..people still turn around and allow it to destroy hard work and effort.
Hellooooo depression! Hellooooo self disgust. Helloooo frustration and loneliness.
I don’t know the answers and I don’t know how to get through it other than leaning on those you trust in times of weakness, or recognizing the oncoming symptoms/feelings and occupying yourself with positive reinforcements until the feeling or situation passes. Do not put yourself in the situation where the addiction or poor choice can happen!! Be smarter than the addiction….. break the cycle.
Allow yourself to feel pride, strength, discipline, integrity, and self confidence in your choices not simply because you’ve made it through another day/week, but because you don’t live in fear that you will choose poorly again.
Addiction lives through FEAR.
Addiction tells us we aren’t good enough.
Addiction makes us feel feel like we are in control when we are NOT.
Addiction creates shame.
Addiction chases loved ones away and tarnishes our image.
Addiction is a beast, a demon, a controller and it thrives on fear.
Addiction creates depression. Depression creates Addiction!!!
The more I live, the more I realize how our minds and self talk is incredible powerful. When you hear those voices telling you “It won’t hurt anything, just do it” — do NOT trust that voice!!!
Say out-loud – “I refuse to sacrifice all that is good in my life for a simple fix.”
Because that weakness is not a solution……………..it’s the problem.
AND….. YOU. ARE. WORTH all that is good!!!!
You deserve happiness and love….. to give it and receive without fear of when it’s going to come crashing down again.
If you are struggling with a food addiction, please contact me. I’ve taken courses on food addictions and will provide that community support to help you overcome the weakness and create healthy habits.
Fight the fear and reach out to me at Bashford.Lisa@yahoo.com
Gym Memberships – Are they worth it?
It’s not rocket science.
We all know that fad diets are only short term (if that) and in order to lose weight and create sexy curves, you must exercise.
Here’s the thing…. research is showing us that workouts don’t have to be 1-2 hours long at the gym in order to see progress and healthy eating does not mean you must never eat chocolate or drink wine again! If you don’t know this, then you must be living under a very heavy rock. 🙂
Workouts and Eating have come a LONG way. Problem is, there’s so much contradicting information out there that it’s confusing and people give up vs. research and find what works best for their body.
When it comes to changing the body and adhering to a healthier lifestyle, going to the gym appears to be part of the process. Did you know that the real changes are made in the kitchen? True story!! Food is the hardest part because that is a decision we must make repeatedly throughout the day whereas getting a workout in is a one-time-per-day choice.
I have many clients and over the past 6 years, I have spoken to many who sign up for gym memberships thinking this is the key to success. They are spending $240+ per year on gyms, another fee for personal training sessions/classes, and still not sure what to eat at home! That’s a lot of money, time, and energy wasted. No wonder why today’s society believes workouts and healthy eating is expensive and not worth the time!
** The gym’s BEST clients are those who never show up!! **
Life happens. I get that. Going to the gym requires you to get into the car, drive (pay for gas), find a locker, wait for equipment, & touch sweaty handlebars/machines. Maybe you are a single parent and then you need to consider child care too. Maybe your schedule only allows you to workout in the evenings and what if the weather is bad?? I’m in Indiana and in the winter, I rarely want to travel in the snow/ice to the grocery let alone the gym.
Does this scenario sound familiar? —> Come home from work, help kids with homework while your cooking dinner, give baths, do a couple house chores, and now it’s time to get the kids to bed — driving to the gym is just not feasible at this point and your membership may not even allow you to show up later in the evenings!
I read a stat on StatisticBrain.com that says the average amount of money being wasted with gym memberships is $39/month and 67% of people with memberships don’t use them!! W-H-A-T??? Even if you are the 33% that uses the membership, without making changes in the kitchen, you won’t find the success you want to see and still get frustrated!
This is why I was SUPER excited when Beachbody released the ’21 DayFix’ program. I knew that my clients were going to find more success at a faster rate because of the easy container system.
- This program teaches you how to make healthy choices and advocates a way to control portions via color coded containers.
Purple container = Fruit
Green Container = Veggies
Red Container = Proteins
Orange Container = Oils and dressings
Yellow Container = Complex carbs
Blue Container = Cheese & nuts
This isn’t a 21-day program and you’re done —– this teaches you how to eat smart for the rest of your life!! Priceless!!!
Also, when you choose an at-home program, you can workout ANYTIME you want. For me, this is a game changer. I’m a busy Momma, so having the flexibility of a workout anytime works well for me and eliminates my excuses. You only need 30 minutes for your workouts with this program and it’s VERY effective — I bet you spend 30 minutes a day looking at social media, so you can squeeze in a workout in that amount of time! 🙂
Let me guess…. your next thought is “It’s too expensive.” But is it??
I’ve already pointed out the gym membership and then added costs of personal trainer and classes. Not to mention the gas and drive time.
Let’s say that’s about $300-400/yearly average and you still aren’t factoring in the food/eating side of losing weight (important part!)
The ’21DayFix Challenge Pack’ costs $160 and includes a nutrition plan PLUS 30 days of Shakeology (highly nutritious meal). I’ll even throw in my meal plan sampler document, grocery list, sample meals, and weekly container tracker which I personally created.
$160.00 for all of that!
AND — often times this challenge pack is on sale for $140!!!!
You are essentially getting a quality workout in your home at any hour, a trainer, a dietician, and a personal coach (me) for one low investment!
Consider this…. gyms have a capacity of people allowed into its facility at one time. Yet, it has thousands of people with memberships. They KNOW you won’t be showing up! Now, they are offering messages, bagel breakfasts, spa treatments, popular classes, supplements, tanning, and when we try to stop paying the $20/month fee, there’s a cancellation fee. Our brains are locked into thinking this is ok and that it’s the only way to try to be ‘healthy.’ Long contracts are scary for most of us….. we don’t like the commitment. However, gyms are different because you envision the ‘new you’ if you sign up. We forget that the ‘new you’ comes with actually consistently going to the gym!
Some people tell me “If I have to pay, I’ll be more inclined to go to the gym regularly.”
Maybe for a little while you will, but then you’ll start to realize that the gym doesn’t care if you are there or not and not one is holding you accountable.
All my customers have the opportunity to join my free facebook fit club meaning there are over 200 people just like us who have busy lives, but are trying to make our bodies a priority too. Over 200 people supporting one another, swapping recipes, and myself being very active in the group sharing tips for success. As a physical therapist, I also can provide assistance with sore muscles and aches/pains. This level of accountability cannot be matched at the gym or with one gym buddy! Why have one when you can have an entire community of support and positivity!
If you decide that you would like to continue with Shakeology because of the nutritional gaps in today’s daily food intake and it makes you feel better, I promise you it’s more affordable than you think. At only $4/day your Shakeology cost is less than most fancy coffee drinks and processed fast food stops.
Consider this wise investment today!
Ask me about ways to save money (if it’s on sale this month) and how to get Shakeology for 25% off too!
LIFE VALUE of COMPLETING the 21DayFix:
- Personal Coach for support and tips. (ME!)
- Group of supportive folks (facebook fit club) just like you and me!
- 30-35 servings of a superfood protein shake to fill in the nutritional gaps.
- 21 Days of focus for changing your lifestyle food habits.
- 30 minutes of exercise/day to brighten your mood, get a handle on stress, and tighten those jiggly areas.
- Easy to follow workout & food program.
- My YourFitness-411 documents created for this program to make it even easier!
- Weight loss and family meals made easier/healthier!
Choose your “Difficult.”
Nearly 12 years ago, I had a new little 3lbs. 15 ounce baby boy who was fighting for a normal life at 32 weeks old. I had no control over what was happening to him.
As I sat next to his little ‘glass box’ for hours at a time staring at him breath with wires and machines surrounding us – I was also thinking about my body and if I was ever going to get it back. I felt horrible….emotionally and physically.
Over the next 5 weeks of going to the NICU I hated my new ‘Mom’ body yet stopped by the Zestos seasonal ice cream drive-thru to get my daily blackberry smoothie to calm my nerves.
Does that make sense??
No – but at that time nothing made sense.
Why would God allow my baby to come early and create this fight for him, for us, and make me so worried/sad that I wanted to vomit everyday? I had no control over what was happening to my son, so I controlled my ‘wants’ with a blackberry smoothie. Damn, they were really good too!!
And, I’ll usually get one a summer because they are tasty, but they always remind me of those scary times. I don’t know why I still do that to myself?
Maybe it’s to remind myself to be thankful because Jacob survived those days and the ONLY reminder is a coil in his heart which does not limit him from activities. I’d like to think it’s to remind myself to be thankful.
I really hated my body then and sometimes I still get irritated when I look in the mirror. It never seems to change fast enough!!! I hated how I felt in clothes and how I tried to conspicuously camouflage my stomach. I hated how I felt jiggly and was not the tight and toned athlete I used to be.
Then I had 2 miscarriages and my body seriously went to hell. I was envious of the other Moms who didn’t have pregnancy issues and looked amazing 12 weeks after delivery. I got pregnant a fourth time and ,y baby girl, Lydia, entered my life.
A full term gorgeous baby girl with dark black curly hair, full lips, and big blue eyes.
I knew then that I was done having children. I wasn’t pressing my luck any more!
AND….. therefore it was time to get my body back.
I wanted my husband and children to be proud of me and how could I allow them to be if I wasn’t proud of myself? I do not believe in the “I’m a Mommy now so I must look like one” theory. I wanted to be a fit and feisty mom that was active and my kids could brag about.
I tried joining the YMCA and fad diets, but all I ever got was frustrations and disappointment. At first I thought if I stopped taking in so much food that the fat would melt off. I was wrong. I had no one to help me through it and was too embarrassed to talk to my friends about my weight. Can you relate? Is that normal?
I saw an infomercial on TV and quietly ordered the workouts. I did a few weeks of them without much success and frankly…..it bored me.
So, time to try something a little more challenging. I needed solid motivation and to start a real weight loss program. I ordered P90X , started using Shakeology for a quick nutritional drink, and joined Team Beachbody so I had a free coach who knew what she was doing to push me and answer my questions.
On my bad days, I reached out to her.
On my good days I reached out to her.
I lost 15 pounds and more importantly, FELT BETTER.
I’ve learned that self confidence and having energy without making poor food choices is the BEST FEELING EVER.
I started running, joined races, ordered more Beachbody home workouts (I now own over 16 programs) and even when I fail …. Which I do daily……. I fail forward.
I had knee surgery last spring which despite my best efforts created a few extra pounds that I’m struggling to get off. Stress and lack of sleep are the culprits —- I know that for sure!
My fate was NOT to be a “typical Mom” who complained about her body and was jealous of others. It sucked many days but I had to choose my ‘DIFFICULT.’
It is difficult to: be fat and it’s difficult to workout each day and eat better.
—->> But one difficult is worth it and the other is just a waste of time and annoying for others to hear you talk about wishing you were smaller.
Some things in life we have NO control over —- such as a preemie baby or miscarriages.
Other things we have ALL the control over — such as what you’re putting in your food hole each day.
** Reminds me of this sweet little prayer I have plastered all over my house:
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
Create your change. Change your difficult.
Do it now before it’s too late and do it so you love yourself for fighting each day to be better than yesterday. The fight is worth it.
My son and I running his first 5K a couple years ago. 🙂
Are you being held hostage by your sweet tooth?
The holidays were sweet. Too sweet!
Even as a Health & Fitness coach, I struggled with discipline over the holidays. I’m human! The stress of Christmas is real & when stressed – that extra glass of wine is too tempting!! Can you relate?
So, when my cousin asked me some questions about Team Beachbody’s ‘3 DayRefresh’ program, I decided to take the leap again and do it with her. That was the push I needed because I was not going to find the motivation to do it on my own. Going solo feels lonely and it’s too easy to quit!
It’s winter, it’s cold, comfort foods are plentiful, I am coming off an emotional end to 2015, and being lazy with food choices is easy. I needed a partner in crime!!! I needed accountability! And, it’s only 3 days, right?
I can do anything for 3 days!!
Audrey and I started our 3 days on a Monday. Over that weekend, we purchased our favorite fresh fruits and veggies for the next 3 days. Meal prep is key!
I gave her some tips beforehand (I’ve done this a few other times before) — such as make sure to drink the fiber drink as soon as you mix it!! If you wait, it will get thick and you’ll think it’s awful. You only drink this once daily for 3 days.
Over the next 72 hours, we texted and reminded one another that it was going to be worth it. We admitted our little mistakes and struggles (I admitting to eating 5 M&M’s – Peanut butter ones), and also shared how amazing we were feeling by day 2!
I woke up with energy and didn’t need to get the energy from coffee!!! I was in awe!!
Day 3 was fairly simple. I wasn’t hungry, grumpy, feigning for sweets, or bloated. That’s success enough!! You can imagine my joy when I realized I was 2.8 pounds lighter on the morning of day 4 and I still didn’t want coffee, sweets, or processed foods.
In 3 days, I was able to reset my body and BRAIN and focus on healthy choices vs. grabbing a Quest bar as breakfast or as a snack between treating my patients.
I was reminded that fresh fruit is super sweet & mentally I was more focused after those 3 days because I felt powerful feeding my body with real food vs. man-made sugar loaded junk.
Audrey found success too!
She lost 4 pounds and more importantly felt better. She said, “People are right when they say that you don’t know how bad you feel until you feel good! Food is powerful!”
We aren’t going to say it was easy. Ridding the body of sugar, salt, and carbohydrate cravings is tough. Audrey had a serious headache the first day & I was fatigued. Those symptoms are not uncommon and remind you of the reason WHY you are taking better measures to control your body and habits.
If you are interested in the 3DayRefresh, email me at Bashford.Lisa@yahoo.com. I’ll answer any questions, show you pricing options, and be there for you when you take the leap with tips & support!
You can do anything for 3 days, right?? (Much more doable than those 10 day cleanses. I’d never last on one of those! I’d be a failure waiting to happen).
What comes with the 3DayRefresh?
It comes in a box with 3 days of Fiber drink, protein drink, instruction booklet, recipes, and Shakeology if you choose. I suggest the Shakeology because it helps keep your belly full while tasting like a treat and gives you extra nutrition which you will use for energy and craving control.
If you get the opportunity to spend 3 days focusing on your nutrition and health —– I’d love to hear how it went!! I’m guessing you’ll be strangely surprised at how you mentally strong you feel within 3 days!! I plan on using this program every few months to keep me on track!
** Gain control back when it comes to what foods you are putting into your mouth!
Feel free to research it on your own at www.beachbodycoach.com/LisaBashford
Ladies: Build Sexy Curves to Burn Calories
Ladies… Don’t be afraid to pick up some weights!
They will help you LOSE weight, LOSE the jiggle, & CREATE beautiful curves!!
Toned Muscle not only looks amazing, but it serves purpose too!
- Decrease the risk of injury during daily activities by holding joints in more stable positions.
- Create more independence (No thank you, I can put the dog food into the grocery cart myself)
- Burns more calories while the body rests than Cardio.
- Takes up less space than fat. Muscle DOES NOT weigh more than fat. 1 pound of feathers = 1 pound of rocks. But, it
- does take up less space than fat, so toned women may weigh the same but fit into smaller clothes.
- Physical Strength.
- No Bulk, more Sex Appeal.
- Lowers your Cholesterol and decreases the risk of Heart Disease. Building muscle promotes the release of good HDL and decreases he amount of bad LDL in your blood stream. This lowers your risk of heart disease among other diseases.
- Weight Bearing exercises decrease the risk of Osteoporosis.
Many women fear they will bulk. You will NOT bulk like a man!
Women don’t have the testosterone that men have in order to bulk and even then, it takes a lot of discipline, the right lifting techniques, food patterns and supplements to grow large muscles. Stop fearing it, ladies! And, no need to spend countless hours at the gym.
You can change the shape of your body within 30 minutes a day.
You don’t want to put in the energy with effective workouts only to have it go to waste with improper food choices. This is where I can help. As a specialist in sports nutrition, I can create a realistic meal plan (options) that will have you turning heads. Exercise + Nutrition = Success.
Not sure how to accomplish this?
Contact me & I will get you started on an exercise program. If you are uncomfortable with the thought of going to the gym, I can help you find a HOME program that you will love. I’ll even coach you through it for FREE!!
You can find me at www.YourFitness-411.com
Regardless of how you go about it, start adding some weight to your life. The GOOD kind of weight!
If you have any questions or would like to discuss how I can tweak your food habits and get you started on an effective program at home, please contact me.
I’d appreciate the opportunity to meet you & get you on the right path! My email is Bashford.Lisa@Yahoo.com.
(My beautiful model is my friend, Nicole Davison, who is a figure competitor.
My company, YourFitness-411.com, has the honor of being her sponsor at her upcoming figure competition!)
Photography is by Joseph at ‘Everyone’s Joy Photography.’
Confusing mix of Focus, Disarray, & Cliché
Life Happens.
This too shall pass.
When it rains it pours.
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Cliché. Everyone says them and everyone means well. Just don’t say them to me right now.
Have you had a clear & focused life plan ….and then it completely changes in an instant?
That instant maybe a phonecall, an accident, announcement, or a single heartbeat. It stops you in your tracks and makes that focused plan fuzzy.
One misstep on the volleyball court changed my focused plan. I’ve been playing volleyball competitivley for over 25 years. One wrong step and BOOM!….pain, panic, and pity flooded me. I knew I had torn something in my knee. I instantly recalled many of the patient’s I’ve treated the past 18 years and their words on how they tore tendons, ligaments, muscles, cartilage. I instantly knew exactly what they were describing to me. It was a lightbulb moment I would have been fine never experiencing.
Two months ago I was focusing on my my presentations for local high schools, sports teams, company luncheons, etc. on ‘Food & Food Timing For weightloss and sports performance’.
I was editing my resume and actively looking to log more hours as a therapist while consulting with more clients regarding their food habits and tweaking those habits for success.
I was planning my running/training schedule for 2 upcoming Ultra Ragnar races in Chicago and Nashville. I was excited about a few days away from busy family life to run on the open road in new places.
My personal life is going through some changes which terrify me too, but the vision was clear.
Fast forward to today.
I sit here drinking my coffee and my brain is in complete disarray.
• My knee has stitches in it from a menisectomy 5 days ago.
• My range of motion (ROM) isn’t where I want it yet and my quad is having difficulty waking up. (Can you imagine if I didn’t take care of my body how much worse it would be?)
• I am pissed that I’ve gained a few pounds since my knee injury and can’t run to feel better.
• I just told my Ragnar team that I will NOT be participating in either race this year. (VERY hard decision since it’s a passion of mine)
• It’s hard to pick up more therapist hours when I’m recovering and on a crutch myself.
• I have about 12 individuals that want to take the leap of faith and join my Beachbody team as reps, but fear is holding them back. “Take the leap! It’s worth knowing if you can do it or not vs. just thinking about it!” (That’s what I find myself repeating often).
• My kids are feeling the stress of these last few weeks of school, friend drama, and other situations which are causing them to be irritable.
For the first time in my ‘type A’ personality life…. My future is uncertain and I have no idea what I’m really doing! EEEEEK!! This is foreign territory for me! The last time I felt like this was the first morning I woke up in the dorm room my freshman year of college in Cincinnati. I had NO idea what to expect or how to cope with college. I had NO idea how my journey would play out or end.
BUT…. As usual, it all worked out. I caught the hang of college life and embraced a daily schedule. I found focus and graduated with a 4.0 and an amazing job. It wasn’t easy…. I had a hell-of-a-time somedays.
Because of that, I know I can get through all the uncertainty now of my personal and professional life. I know I am strong enough to conquer anything thrown at me & I have the personality for success. I don’t need cliches. The problem is, sometimes I don’t WANT to be strong enough. Some days, I just want to cry in my coffee and ask the famous question… WHY ME?
I know there must be a plan. A bigger plan than what I know.
There MUST be a reason why I have been forced to slow down, refocus, experience surgery and therapy as a patient vs. the therapist, leave my Ragnar team, and look at my future in an entirely new solo way.
I have to BELIEVE.
I don’t have to like it. I don’t have to know all the answers. (Did I really just say that?) I don’t have to be strong and pretend I have it all together all the time. (That’s a new lesson I’m learning). I don’t have to do this alone.
With prayer and some healthy support from others, I’ve been forced to see life in new ways.
I know a few things for sure.
• I will continue to educate and assist others on changing their food and exercise habits to create success & more active lifestyles.
• I will continue my mission to help others feel better about their bodies & do my part in fighting childhood obesity and food addictions/disorders.
• I will continue to be a leader for my children & someone they can depend on with 100% certainty.
• I will continue to fight my way back to running and rehab this knee and I will for CERTAIN have the body I’ve been focused on by my 40th Birthday this October.
• I will be a leader in the community.
Mark my words…. I will look back at all this in October as I’m running a half marathon near the ocean and celebrating my milestone Birthday in bikini with a banging body in the warm sand & know that I HAD to go through all these debacles to get to there. I have lessons to learn and I’m in the middle of them. I’m very determined and I will not apologize for it. I will be successful.
But for now… I’m going to rewarm my coffee, listen to the rain, and Google races near the ocean the weekend of October 17/18. Then, grab my crutch and go to the gym to ride the bike for increased knee range of motion while I review the food presentation I’m giving at a company luncheon this week.
NEVER GIVE UP.
When the world seems gloomy & nothing is going the way you expected……stay with the fight. Remind yourself that there is a lesson in the times of struggle and something brighter is in your future.
Make no apologies or excuses and find the peace of mind you deserve.
YOU. ARE. WORTH. IT.
If you would appreciate assistance finding your focus and plan regarding food, exercise, sports performance, or body image goals – please reach out to me. I’d be happy to assist you and keep you focused. Bashford.Lisa@yahoo.com
Will an Oreo cookie will make you feel better?
Ever wonder why you’ve stopped losing weight or maybe you’re doing everything ‘right’
but the fat is still hanging on??
Take a close look at your daily stress and learn how to jump start your body for success.
WHEN CORTISOL LEVELS RISE,
INSULIN LEVELS RISE TOO AND INSULIN IS A FAT STORING HORMONE.
(Did you just have a light bulb moment?)
Let me explain more >>>
The hormone “Cortisol” is linked with emotions and the body releases Cortisol in times of stress & emotional situations.
** Humans are naturally wired for emotional pleasure & drive. The part of our brain that relates to this is the Amygdala which is our “sensor’ for emotions. This blog gets better, I promise. Stress & emotions cause us to take actions that are not healthy for us… such as: eat the wrong foods at the wrong time and make big purchases. Do you eat or shop when stressed? Not only are we making impulse unhealthy decisions for our bodies and bank accounts, but cortisol is being released in the body.
Cortisol = inflammation.
When cortisol elevates, so does insulin, and the body starts to store fat.
Inflammation and fat storage…. sounds like a disaster, right? It is!!!
Do you want inflammation in your brain and body for long periods of time? I don’t!
** STRESS IS A KEY FACTOR IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF ADDICTION.
Another thing to think about….. Serotonin is a chemical created by the human body and is manufactured in the brain and the intestines. Too much or too little of this chemical can cause many symptoms. The majority of the body’s serotonin, between 80-90%, can be found in the gastrointestinal tract. It is commonly regarded as a chemical that is responsible for maintaining mood balance.
Having obscene amounts of sugar and carbohydrate over long periods of time can max out our serotonin machinery, leaving us unhappy, carb-craving, and depressed. What happens when you are unhappy, carb-craving, and depressed??
You reach for more junk food and sugar.
See the cycle??
____________________________________________________________________________________
How do we solve this?
Telling someone to “decrease your stress” is irritating. If it were that easy, we would!!!!
There is no ‘perfect’ answer for each human body. But, we must FOCUS and be MINDFUL. Those 2 words go together so well!! When you find yourself reaching for the Red Velvet Oreos or ready to buy that new TV, stop ‘justifying’ it and realize that your human brain is wired for that action when it’s stressed…but you can change that!
Here are techniques to try.
Find 1-3 that work for you and practice them often.
- Breathe deeply and FOCUS on the breath.
Be MINDFUL and honest with yourself about what is going on in your life that could be causing stress, irritation, annoyance, and the feeling of being overwhelmed. - Consider starting a food journal and not only document when you are eating, but HOW YOU FEEL during that part of the day. Example: 3:00pm – 3 Oreo Red Velvet cookies (just left a business meeting and feeling overwhelmed)
- Sunlight. Get more sunlight during the winter months when it’s very easy for depression to set in. Serotonin is our mood balance chemical. Light therapy and serotonin-increasing medications are both effective treatments for depression that occurs with low levels of sunlight. Light exposure increases serotonin in humans, and serotonin levels are lowest in midwinter, and higher on bright days no matter what time of year. You can purchase light therapy products at many stores. 10,000 lux light therapy decreases suicidal ideation in some folks. (www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evolutionary-psychiatry/201105/sunlight-sugar-and-serotonin)
- Eat more foods in their natural state and avoid the over processed foods that contain hidden sugar and sodium. As I taught you…. sugar can max out our seratonin making us MORE sad and depressed.
- Exercise. Get the mood boosting chemical endorphin release from a natural high. Exercise is natural brain power producer to fight against depression and mood….which also will help you fight the food addictions.
- Stop all the distractions. Multi-tasking is ruining us. Our brains are not focusing on one task, leaving room for mistakes. Society is telling us to do more, more, more……accomplish more in the same 24 hours. Once again creating stress. Do one thing at a time and do it well. That will encourage a greater sense of pride and accomplishment while keeping the stress low. FOCUS. Don’t fall victim to people telling you to ‘do more!’ Learn to say “No” and stay focused.
- Meditate. This doesn’t mean you have to sit in a dark room and hum. Meditate in the shower! You have 5-10 minutes to focus on the warm water running over your body, the clean invigorating smell of shampoo and soap, the calm steam in the air, the sounds of water, and the feeling of washing stress and anxiety down the drain. (Don’t you feel more relaxed just visualizing the scene I put into your brain?) The problem is….we allow our brains to think about dinner, the project that is due, the car that needs fixed, and the fight with our Mom the day before…….that we don’t allow the brain to clear. Be MINDFUL of what’s happening around you and pay attention to your senses. The sense of smell and hearing are powerful. Just think how much money the candle and music companies make from those 2 senses!!!
- Laugh. Did you know that when we laugh, we are able to tolerate more pain? It’s true! Laughter releases endorphins which also raise our ability to ignore pain. Think about how we treat children when we know they are going to get an injection, our instinct is to make them smile or laugh before and after. You were PROGRAMMED to naturally want to make others laugh at times of discomfort.
- Massage: I learned in college the power of human ‘touch’ and all that it can do for us mentally, emotionally, and physically. It’s safe to say we all crave human touch….. when we are sad, a hug feels good. Simply holding someone’s hand can bring calmness and inner peace. You’ve heard of ‘angry sex’ after an argument or intimacy when feeling vulnerable. It’s another example of an endorphin release! Endorphin release is usually caused by physical activity, like exercise, or touch, like massage.
Develop the part of your brain that controls emotions and pleasure. Retrain your brain for success!!!! Continuing to allow yourself to seek comfort in food is in no way, shape, or form healthy and we all know it. And, I’ve just educated you on why it’s unhealthy (creates disease) and how you can fight against it with many options. It’s going to happen….. I will grab a handful of Peanut Butter M&M’s at some point in the future when stressed……… but the point is to recognize what is happening to your body and retrain it to find that ‘feel good chemical release’ from another source than processed foods. Telling yourself you’ll just munch on carrots vs. a donut won’t do the trick. Your brain is needing the sugar and fat from the donut, and honestly, a carrot isn’t going to fulfill your brain. Recognize this and be ready with more options to quiet the brain.
** Recap: reaching for a sleeve of Red Velvet Oreos during the afternoon work session may seem to be a ‘craving’…..but really it’s your brain trying to seek pleasure because it doesn’t know how to handle the stress and chemical release. Not only is it trying to seek pleasure, but it’s also releasing Cortisol (creating inflammation in the body) and Insulin (fat storage) and over a long period of time, constant cortisol released will cause weight gain, disease, and unhappiness. Instead… close your eyes and focus on your breathing. Take a walk around the office. Listen to music. Sit next to the window and get some sun on your face. Make your co-worker tell you a funny joke. (Tip: Not all co-workers are funny, so seek out the ones that honestly make you smile.)
With practice and mindfulness…. you’ll break those food addictions soon because you’ll be breaking what is CAUSING them. The brain!!!
If you would like more information or to ‘pick my brain’ on this topic or others, please contact me at Bashford.Lisa@yahoo.com.
I would love to set up a time to meet with you, your company, your sports team, or any group of people to teach them more about a healthy lifestyle, food addictions, food for sports performance, and changing the body’s shape in a healthy manner.
Visit my website to see what’s on sale this month regarding home workouts & to learn more about me! (Lisa Bashford)
www.YourFitness-411.com
The million dollar question…
“What if I squeezed myself into any shape
And I still don’t fit?
What if I bend myself so much that I break
And I can’t mend it?
What if I burn so bright that the fire goes out
And I can’t stay lit?
What’s the point in it?
I could get good at crying crocodiles tears
Just to get along.
I could carry on telling you what you wanna hear
Till my voice is gone.
But if I finally get to the place that I think is home
And I don’t belong.
What’s the point in it, where’s the benefit
When I’m gaining all but I’m losing it?”
—————————————————————————————————————————
This is a powerful song by Natasha Bedingfield that has helped me through many tough situations in my life. A friend introduced me to this song years ago….and it makes me re-evaluate my choices and thoughts and helps to re-direct my mind to stay on the path I want to be on.
For the first time in a very long time…..I’ve found myself in an unwarranted emotional situation. The details aren’t important….but the emotional rampage my mind & soul have been going through is taking a toll on my daily routine. I haven’t experienced this emotional roller-coaster since beginning my fitness journey about 5 years ago.
As a coach, when people tell me they have fallen off the fitness train because of a tough situation….whether it be a death in the family, house fire, divorce, ill parent, loss of job, or just life in general —— I would respond with “Exercise increases your mood and helps to beat stress – you can do this!” And I still believe that and stand by those words.
Honestly…… that’s why I do a lot of running. I started running because I found the therapeutic aspect of it to be attractive. I felt better, I looked better, it was time to myself, I could work out my problems and pray during those long miles. The endorphin rush after a long run was powerful (Either that or I was just too damn tired to care after a long run!) But, it’s well known that running is a natural antidepressant, and I found that to be true. It helped me beat the stresses of being a Mother, Sister, Daughter, Wife…….and allowed me to focus on ME.
I tell you this because the past 10 days have been absolutely insane in my world. New information about health and relationships have left me feeling lost and broken.
Because of this, I have missed many workouts this week and lost my appetite. That alone speaks volumes because I love to exercise!! I’ve gotten my workout clothes on, drank pre-workout beverage, and just couldn’t do it. The thought of food made me want to vomit and I wasn’t hungry. Can you relate to this?? I surely cannot be the only one!
As a therapist and nutritionist, I KNOW my choices were not healthy or helping me to heal in any shape or form mentally, emotionally, or physically.
The million dollar question I get asked is = “If I don’t feel like it, how do I do it?”
That’s a pretty general question and I typically say….. “You just do it. Dig deep and tell me when the workout is completed because I cannot wait to hear how it went and how you feel after!”
But there’s a difference between that question and “When you don’t emotionally feel well and can’t find the motivation from within, how do you do it??”
This is a question I will now be answering differently. I’m learning from experience the deep gut feeling where you REALLY don’t want to (or just can’t) from emotions. I’m not sure all the answers and because it’s not a black/white problem with black/white answers……..it’s going to be different for everyone. I will be able to pull from my experience and understand my clients better! And….that will continue to make me a coach worthy of helping others because I can relate on many levels and am very realistic to today’s busy family lifestyles.
I used to find motivation in my Instagram feed because it is filled with workout pics and bodies getting stronger. That’s all it used to take to make me think, “Hell, if they can do it then so can I!!”
But…. My mind has been saying this week, “Good for them….. Screw it.” (Once again, I know some of you are relating to me!)
I have missed about 4 workouts this week and that is 4 too many. The workouts I have done are only 2-3 miles at a time on the treadmill in my basement and half-assed. I have lost 4-5 lbs. and I am NOT happy about it (even though my goal is a total of 10 more).
What’s my point to all this?? Just to let you know experience is teaching me to be a better fitness/health coach and showing you that life happens to all of us. Stress and heartache happen to everyone, no one is superhuman.
Today’s Goal: I WILL actually go to the gym today and get a workout in which includes cardio and weights. That FREE tanning bed is sounding pretty nice right now too!
I know I am strong enough to get through this, although there’s a little voice in my head questioning it. It’s not pretty, but I have some amazing friends that support me and my faith is a blessing. I truly believe everything happens for a reason…and right now that reason is something only God knows. But, if I’m not going to help myself, I cannot complain about it either.
I’m learning to not allow negativity (situations and people) stop me from doing what I love to do.
——————————————————————————————————————————
“Don’t wanna end up like pirate bones
What I thought was treasures is just a pile of stones.
I might have to judge it, better be lying alone
Pirate bones.
If I forfeit my soul it ain’t worth having.
If it’s something I stole, it ain’t worth having.
It’s not worth that much to me
If losing out is what it means
This way means shallow victory
Is empty, empty.
It’s just not worth the prize
It’s only a fool’s paradise
If it’s draining every drop of lies
Till I’m dry, lie, pirate bones.”
Natasha Bedingfield – Pirate Bones
If you are struggling with your weight, food, or exercise routine…. I urge you to contact me.
I’m a fitness challenge Specialist and love it! 30 minute workouts, nutrition plan, shopping list, motivation, support group ………everything you need to see positive changes. Find me & send me a message at www.facebook.com/YourFItnessInfo
YourFitness-411: Stronger Inside & out 